My friends have been threatening to choke me a lot lately lol.
But jokes on them, because I like that.
By nature we learn to unappreciate the things we have too much of.
Everyone treats me like I’m crazy. When all I’m trying to do is stay happy. But I’m not happy. Nothing makes me happy anymore. You will text me all of these things. And tell me them. About how you want me to wait for you. And how you love me. And miss me and only think about me. And how your body is only mine. And you’ll cry to me.
Come over and lie to your friends about where you are. You’ll lay down with me in bed and call me beautiful. And hold me close and say sweet nice things to me and you make me feel like you actually still want me. You tell me to trust you.
You betray everything I ever gave to you. I’m just trying to be good enough. I love you with all my heart.
Why do you keep me around. When all you do is fuck with other girls and tell everyone how much you hate me.
But come back to me an tell me how I’m the only one you want.
It fucking kills me. It rips me up and tears me to shreds. I can’t fucking take the pain anymore. It eats me alive and it hurts so fucking bad. To be so in love with someone who’s a monster like you. And you dont even care and probably never will. That you turned out to be everything you promised you wouldn’t.
And I just want to collapse in your arms. Every single day you tell me you love me. And every single night like clock work I sit in my dark room for hours and cry my eyes out and wonder why I can’t just take my own life.